I've been seriously slacking about blogging but as usual, I have excuses:
- School
- Procrastinating about school
- Trying to read the the last eight chapters of the textbook, complete 10 chapter assignments, take 3 tests and write a paper. In one week.
- Wine
- A blind, diabetic dog I wrestle twice a day during Insulin Time (not as fun as Family Time, and with more physical contact)
- Work
- Thinking about work
- Playing Burger Time
- Wine
- Online shopping while drinking wine
- Fretting over the lack of funds in my bank account when I finally sober up
- The new Twilight movie
Okay, so I lied about the last one. I don't follow that shit, don't even know what it is about, except that vampires are really good-looking. And apparently don't smile that often.
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| I don't get it. At all. |
I could post photos of my recent online shopping activity but that would only be interesting to me. And quite possibly, it would make me shop some more.
Instead, I will rant. Here are a few of the things that have pissed the fuck outta me lately:
- Leaves falling. I don't do yard work, so I'll have to pay someone to rake them for me = less online shopping
- Being woke up at four a.m. Every. Single. Day. Thanks Buzzy.
- Driving in Dallas
- Not winning the lottery
- Insulin Time (because who wants to be associated with a sharp needle?)
- The Food Baby
- Bad Hair Days so awful that I have to plan my outfit around which hat I will be wearing
- Everything else
Happy Thanksgiving! Be thankful you don't have to spend it with me.
I'm too lazy to come up with anything good, but I need to get back into the habit of blogging, so today I am just going to give you the most current list of Things That Piss The Fuck Out Of Me Daily. Enjoy.
- People who don't know how to drive - this consists of about 99.999% of the driving population...in other words, everyone else but me
Children who run out into the street in front of my car Parents who do not watch their children so that they run out into the street in front of my car- Mental Giants who think it's acceptable to stop and text in the middle of the entrance to a grocery store
- The Facebook Name Nazis who wouldn't accept "Chicken" as a nickname...hello, you suck
- Waking up at four in the morning
- Infomercials (there is nothing else on at four in the morning)
- Really bizarre infomercials with 20-something girls talking about how "size matters" - I don't want to see that shit in the middle of the night
- Sagging - Seriously, you all aren't over this yet??
- Self-proclaimed "foodies" who really don't know what they are talking about
- One-Up-Manship (only because I'm better than you are, so you can't win at this game)
- Idiots who read blogs like thebloggess.com and take the humor seriously
- The fact that I deleted the original non-girlfriend and didn't bother to archive
- My Food Baby
- That I was drunk blogging three weeks ago and lost the login info to my original URL...this one pretty much blows
I leave you with this:
It's disgusting. And it's what I put on top of my tiny white dog's food just so the spoiled little brat will eat his dry dog food. The dry dog food that costs about $10 for a small bag.
[No apologies for the Stinky Salmon Picture. If I have to look at that shit on a daily basis, so do you.]
